8 Simple Rules For Being My Mommy

I have a highly opinionated child (no idea where he gets that from haha). He believes he has set the ground rules for our house, which seem to be:

1) If my eyes are open, it’s time to feed me.

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2)  I find conversation ruins the ambience of Mom’s Diner and will not permit it. Violations are punishable by pitiful whining.

3) If there’s a bowl and a spoon, whatever’s in it is mine on pain of pouting adorably.

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4) Babies in mirrors are not to be trusted. They make funny faces at me and get kisses from my mommy and I Do. Not. Like. Them.

5) Mommy may not eat or drink anything if I am not directly supervising the meal from her lap.

6) Mommy may not refer to schedules of when I “should” do anything. I’ve got my own, thank you very much.

7) Daddy may kiss and hug Mommy and me, but must always observe Rule #2.

8) Mommy and Daddy may occasionally dress up in grownup clothes, but I reserve the right to critique their fashion choices by spitting up on them.

Rules and regulations subject to change without notice. Reward for full compliance to be paid in snuggles and smiles.

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